Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Oh Crap!

Trouble creates a capacity to handle it.
                             Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

Is this the cutest inside of an outhouse you ever did see? My friend H builds these custom built outhouses and sells them to people for hunting camps and cottages. I truly wish we had that nice of an outhouse growing up. She is truly a great carpenter and I am so proud of her.

As the title and the quote hints I have seen some trouble lately and I care to deal with it with my own sense of strange humour I hope you get it.
This title seemed appropriate and my friend H’s outhouse seemed to fit so here is my theory and my story.

 I am totally surrounded by a beautiful life, a solid foundation of loving friends and family and I worked hard at building these things, just as H works hard at building her outhouses and a great life for her kids. H builds these beautiful outhouses with her own two hands and tends to every detail making it look pretty and very strong always knowing that in the end it is going to be full of crap (I warned you) that does not stop her, she keeps building them because that is what you are supposed to do in life and she is not going to waste her talents.

 You have to think of the bigger picture and doing what you can. You have to keep building and trying even when you know crap will be coming. Just be happy and work through all those troubles and believe me there will always be troubles. You will make it and after this last month or should I say especially the last few weeks I know that foundation and attention to detail will win out in the end.

On October 9 I told you about taking that “miracle pill” for my Fibromyalgia, I did not have any expectations but I did have hope. I truly was at the point I wanted to enjoy the beautiful surroundings and things I have built without dealing with this pain of which I had no control. I took my first pill and slept well the first night. I awoke in the morning with a little headache but did not think too much about it.

Over the next few days I noticed I still had a dull ache in my head but I also noticed that after that first full week the always there never letting up intense pain I have in my arms and legs was beginning to dull down. I was so excited I must admit. I was finding I was sleeping better and had more energy. I could so deal with this dull ache, I was thinking this was working and I would stay the course as they say and the headache would go away. The next week was even better for the first time in eight years I was not dealing with the pain in my chest and arms and I was practically jumping for joy and thinking about hiking and snowshoeing and all those things I loved to do.

The doctor and pharmacist told me to gradually increase the dosage after the first week I did not do that, it was working good enough and I could deal with the little pain I felt. I was only taking 25mg of this Lyrica every night and I was going to continue to do that and I had no desire to increase that. Still a dull ache in my head but I thought it would go away. I was wrong.

I awoke at the end of the two and a half week mark with a pounding headache and a little dizzy, silly me kept taking that one “miracle pill” daily. I loved not feeling that intense burn in my arms and legs I was going to keep going convincing myself maybe it was just my body trying to get used to it. Bear in mind I have not taken anything for the Fibro since before 2004 and I quit a drug then. I did not know what to expect.

One night I was sitting down with My Hero and watching a movie on TV when I noticed I could not read the bottom of the screen, my eyes were blurry and I still had this ache in my head. This would not have alarmed me if I had not had an eye appointment in August coming out with a clean bill of health. I could not read a book the next day. Now I was panicking.

This is when strange things started happening as I weaned myself off, one pill every other night. I threw my good leather gloves in the wood stove thinking it was a piece of wood; I threw my watch in the washer for some unknown reason, I was now not able to see clearly nor understand what I was reading (I know my blog posts, well I hope were not too bad because I tend to do three at a time I do not know what the comments I left you were like) I made an appointment with my doctor. My eyesight and my mind are way more important to me then dealing with pain.

Disappointed I took those pills back and handed them to the doctor and told her to take them even though they cost me $56 and I had only taken half of them. She offered me Amitriptyline but side effects in people who have glaucoma in their family are possible. I refused so now I am back to the drawing board I guess. I am going to keep trying but I am pretty sure the whole drug thing is not going to work out for me I have been scared off again.

 I am so happy for those of you who this drug has worked but I am apparently not one of those lucky ones. I am not blaming the drug I know it works for some people very well, good for you.

I guess what my reference to “Crap” is all about life, you know there is going to be crap but it should never stop you from carrying on and making your dreams come true and not worry about a little trouble. Make beauty when you can and share it, the rest of your life will work out if you never give up.

I hope you get this post as I may still be in withdrawal but my eyes are a little clearer and my headache is starting to ease off this morning. 

Oh and H I am so proud of you, I know you get it. They sure are pretty outhouses and I know you are going to make it to where your dreams are taking you.



  1. I'm sending you gentle, warm hugs Buttons.

    Not sure if you're aware of this or not, but those with fibro tend to react strangely to medications. I've learned from experience not to be afraid to try new meds but to proceed with caution and be very, very aware; my family and physicians are on the alert as well.

    I had problems with Lyrica and amitryptiline as well and for years all I took was an over the counter medication: Aleve for arthritis. I hope you find something which works for you.

  2. Its beautiful! when I was a kid my great-grandparents farm had a really old smelly one that I hated to use.

  3. Side effects can be just awful. I'm sorry the new med didn't work out. I hope you find a better solution.

    That is a very nice outhouse!

  4. Dear B, I felt so sad for you that the medication caused such bad side effects. Sending warm good wishes that you're able to find something with which your compatible, or some means of finding relief.
    I love the outhouse (or, dunny, or thunderbox as we call them over here in Australia). Your friend has true talent in making them look so inviting :D)

  5. How sad that the medication doe not work for you! I hope you do find relief and SOON.

    I never knew an outhouse could be so attractive!

  6. Oh crap! I'm sorry about all this...wish I could fix it for you!!

    Tell your friend I love her outhouses...never thought I'd say that, but I do! Makes me almost want to go sit there with a book! :)

  7. Oh man...I am so sorry that the drug didn't work for you. Surely something else will come on the market that can help.

  8. i hope you find something that works wonderful for you soon...hugs! and that is an adorable little outhouse!

  9. Would the headache have subsided if you had increased the drug? Just curious.

    I watch the commercials for these drugs and the side effects seem worse than the actual condition. Oy.

  10. B...I sure hope something will work for you. You've been through enough crap! What a classy outhouse.

  11. That is some scarey medicine! But I absoulutely must have one of these outhouses!

  12. I have read of bad side effects from the drug you were taking. I hope things can get better for you!

  13. That sounds so scary- I would have gotten off of the pills too. I hope you can find something that works soon- keep your spirits up!

  14. "Trouble creates a capacity to handle it."

    It is so nicely said.


  15. i am truly sorry. but the clarity of mind, eyesight and safety is utmost. i hate that it did not work.

  16. So sorry. Wish I were closer so I could help you with the dust bunnies and the chores that require big muscles. Hang in there.

    Hoping you find something that is more helpful for the crap in your life. Those outhouses are beautiful! I, too, wish there would have been such a lovely place to "meditate" on the farm where I grew up.

  17. B, I love how honest and real you are! Prayers to you and your health. I hope you find something that works for you.

    I needed this post today. It has been a rough couple of days. Part of realizing a dream is having the stars" line up right. No matter how hard we work; a pinch of luck goes a long way.

    Hugs to you!

  18. I was so hopeful after I read that post of yours earlier and I'm so sorry it didn't work. I hope there's something out there that will work for you.
    Thank you so much for the nice compliment, Buttons. It really made me happy.

  19. Dear Buttons,
    I am so sorry that the pills did not work for you. I don't trust pharmacy medicine usually because of all the side effects, thinking nature has given us what we can use safely - but it is figuring out WHAT naturally grown herb that is that will be effective is the question!
    I don't know what fibramyalgia (sorry, I know I'm not spelling it right) is - if all allergies have been ruled out, there is nothing toxic in your home's construction or materials, you are sleeping in a room with black out curtains on a good mattress, and you are getting exercise and don't have nerve damage from diabetes, it is very very baffling.
    My empathy.

  20. crap is fertilizer.


    and isnt it nice to know that it was the meds and not you - that you are not crazy? some of us dont have meds to blame you know!!! LOL

    wishing that the rest of the year for you to be in NO pain, but in content.

    (((hugs to buttons)))

    ps I am in awe of carpenter friend- she does great work!

  21. I'm with Nancy, it seems that a lot of the time the potential side effects are worse than the medication. I hope you can find something to help with the pain dear Buttons. {{HUGS}}
    Tell your friend that her outhouses are awesome!!

  22. So sorry the medicine didn't work out for you :( That must be frustrating. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

    PS - That outhouse is beautiful! I never thought I would use "beautiful" and "outhouse" in the same sentence haha.

  23. Sorry the meds didn't work , have you ever tryed the natural herbs yes weed , marijuana I am serious it is used as a medicinal form of medication when nothing else works especially for chronic pain ! I do hope you can find some peace with all this pain ! I love that outhouse very snazzy . Take care and hope you have a good day !

  24. Sometimes when I hear the side effects of drugs I wonder how they ever make it to market. I am so sorry that you had problems with this drug. I hope you will be able to find one that will work for you without those terrible side effects.

  25. Bummer. So sorry the new meds didn't do the trick for you. But don't give up; maybe the next one. That outhouse looks a lot like the one we had at our cabin on the Susquehanna River. Nothing like sitting there looking out the picture window (!) at the boats going by on the water.

  26. Oh Buttons I am sorry to hear that your miracle pill caused so many problems!! I hope you are getting back to normal (although it sucks that 'normal' is still painful).

    And those are very pretty outhouses!

    Thinking of you!

  27. Sorry B! My Mom couldn't take that one either

  28. My heart goes out to you for not only having the courage to try something different but to also wean yourself off. Like you said, we must keeping building and trying and shuffling through the crap until we reach that happy medium. I really hope you can find something else to help with the pain. xoxo!

  29. oh Buttons, I can't imagine living with constant pain like that... It must be so debilitating. As per the outhouse, my tush approved this message ;-)

  30. I'm so sorry the medication didn't work out as you had hoped. :( Your story of throwing gloves in the fire reminded me of my mom doing crazy things on her Parkinson's medication, like microwaving her cell phone and spreading peanut butter on the stove burners. Yeah, we got her off that CRAP pretty quick. I hope and pray that a miracle drug or treatment comes along soon to bring you some relief. You have a great attitude, though, and a wonderful sense of humor! Hugs!!

  31. I am very sorry for the disappointment. Everything in life has pain. I deal with students everyday that are full of emotional pain. Why is it the people that are emotional sound have the physical pain.

  32. Oh B....sorry it turned out this way for you. I tried Lyrica too and had the vision problems like you. I throw gloves in the fire and cellphones too, as a normal routine. But I cannot stand headaches and vision problems always scare me.

    Sally Forth, dear heart. And don't quit trying!!

  33. That must have been so disappointing for you. Hopefully something else will come along to help you without side effects.

  34. When I get my computer back i'm going to send you an e-mail. In the meantime start taking a warm bath every night. Make it a ritual...light candles, get a good book to read, one that you can get lost in, a cup of tea.... The key is to relax as much as possible. And try a hot water bottle for the headaches. I have been where you are and could not take meds.
    Cindy Bee

  35. oh crap indeed. i think your friend needs to build you a sauna instead! she wouldn't have to alter this too much and it could very well help with your pain...just a thought.

  36. Oh Buttons,
    I'm so sorry to hear that the medicine didn't work. I really hope that you do find one that does. I will keep you in my prayers.
    Big big hug.
    PS Wow that outhouse looks great. Good job H!


The mind grows by what it feeds on. J.G. Holland

Thank you so much for your comments, they mean more to me then I could ever express. Hug B

Please do not copy my work. If you like it let me know I am sure we can work something out. Copyright is in place.