Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Family Pieces

If there is anything better than to be loved, it is loving.

My brother sat in his car as My Hero and he had a nice conversation. I could not engage in the conversation because all I could do was to stare at my brother’s hands.

My brother has the same hands as my Dad who has been gone for a long time now. Those long fingers also reminded me of my grandfather’s hands. Tears welled up in my eyes. 
They were tears of joy not of sadness. It is true that I miss my father terribly and always will, but there gripping a steering wheel was still a piece of him right when I needed to see it. My brother happens to hug just like my father and I take as many of those hugs as I can get. He is not the only family member who carries our father’s traits. I can see bits and pieces of both my parents in each and every one of us.

Tomorrow, I will be in the cemetery (rain or shine) with my sisters. We will be blowing bubbles. It will be the second anniversary of my Moms passing on April 19. I miss both my parents so much, especially my Mom. That loss still seems like yesterday some days, but life goes on and that is the way it should be. Mom loved bubbles. Days at the retirement home were spent in the driveway filling the air with those pieces of joy. Her smile and childlike delight were always contagious.

My youngest sister Tess came for a visit the other day. I noticed that she carries pieces of both of our parents. We all inherited that need to care deeply about the rights of children and every time I watch Tess talk about her work I can see our Dad’s passion for fighting for what is right. Pieces of those who we loved are indeed scattered. As a matter of fact, all my sisters and I have pieces of our Mom. I take great comfort in all these pieces that have been scattered around our family. If you take the time to notice you may also pick up on those little things that meant so much to you in your own families. This fact has gotten me through those tough days.

Last year we filled the cemetery with bubbles. They floated up in the air and we watched as they popped to release those pieces of love, mixed with the sadness that still lingers. My sisters and I laughed and remembered all those good times. The other people who were in the cemetery to visit those they had lost had smiles as they watched us. 
Sisters, who hugged and cried and thank God every day for the blessing we received to have parents that loved us and did the best they could. Two parents who even during the worst of times always put us first. Parents that left pieces that I take advantage of now, whenever I get the chance. Today I have to go surround myself with those pieces. I need a hug from my brother and sisters.

I miss all of those who left us way too early but I am grateful for those pieces that were left behind especially Mom's fashion sense.

 My only regret is that I had not taken any photos of my Dad’s hands, but I do still have my brothers to remind me.



  1. Dear Buttons, I can so relate. Today is already 6 months since my beloved daughter Nicole left us so unexpectedly and I still have that vision in my head of her trying to call for help as she laid alone and sick in her bed... I've been weepy eyed all morning as I drove to the vet lab, as I prepared the meal, as ate my lunch and as I go about my day. My heart feels flat yet it loves so much.

    Warm hugs, I understand.

    1. Hugs hugs hugs I wish I could do more Julia. xo

  2. Lovely post! It is true about character traits that we can see in our aging bodies that remind us of a parent, or two. My sisters both remind me so much of our mother. When my baby sister was home last summer I noticed how much her hands and movements were like our mother's and it was almost a spooky feeling to me. She had no idea, until I told her, how much she resembles our Mum. It's a good feeling though.

  3. Love ❤️ and hugs. Losing my mum is one of my worst nightmares.

  4. It is difficult to write a comment through tears. I looked in the mirror recently and saw my Mother, who we lost 11 years ago when she was only 49. I catch my Dad looking at me sometimes, and know he sees it too. I am 41 and I look more and more like her the older I get. My sisters have commented on it too and feel comforted by the likeness. It is a bizarre and beautiful thing, the similarity and how it makes us feel eternally connected.
    Hugs to you,

  5. Poignant and beautiful.
    I hope that the bubbles tomorrow bring you lots and lots of comfort. Love and laughter never go astray.

  6. I have thought a lot about my husband's hands in the past few days. His hands and eyes are among his best features. One of our dearest friends - one that Randy would have called a best friend - died unexpectedly last Wednesday. We had his funeral yesterday. As I've held Randy's hand, I have thought that my friend can no longer hold her husband's hand. It breaks my heart on so many levels. This was a beautiful post. Thinking of you as you celebrate your Mom.

  7. I think that your post was a wonderful tribute to your parents. I love the bubbles. That is such a nice act of release and memories! Good luck tomorrow, I'm sure it's a sad and wonderful event. xx

  8. Prayers and hugs being sent your way.

  9. Sometimes the traits are very obvious and detailed. Other times we have to search for likenesses we received from parents.. It's good that you go out and celebrate as your mother would celebrate.

  10. My family weren't huggers, we were more distant and detached, but my brother is a hugger and I feel warm and welcomed every time he visits. I see bits of my mother in my sister and I have my father's laziness-when-at-home. I like the idea of you filling the cemetery with the bubbles your mum loved.

  11. Sweet Buttons,

    I'm with you in heart and soul! Blow those bubbles in honor of your Mom and Dad. They'll be above watching down on you and your siblings smiling as every bubble floats in the air. Sending hugs your way.

  12. This was so beautiful dear ((((((Buttons)))))).

    Love you ~ FlowerLady

  13. I could just see the sky filled with bubbles. What a glorious sight that must be. This was such a tender, tear-filled, wonderful remembrance. I can't believe it has been two years since the loss of your mother - it is good that you carry her still in your heart. What a wonderful family you have and are.

  14. Family can be amazing but there are also some terrible families, my family is amazing and I am blessed to be part of it, this post was bloody great

  15. I enjoyed being "stirred up" with my family memories
    as I reflected along with you.
    Just thinking of hands takes me to my father, my mother.
    As I look down on my hands I see my mother . . .
    Happy Easter Buttons!

  16. Hugs to you Miss B! I hope you and your siblings had a celebration of life. A life lived, love and touched.

    I often notice quirks in myself that remind me of Mom and other things that make me think "I got that from Dad." My Hubby is a spitting image of his Dad and his personality is so like his Mom. Having J's folks home for calving I am reminded of that on a daily basis.

    I'm sure you can see that in your girls too and maybe even little L. Kind of makes life fun!


The mind grows by what it feeds on. J.G. Holland

Thank you so much for your comments, they mean more to me then I could ever express. Hug B

Please do not copy my work. If you like it let me know I am sure we can work something out. Copyright is in place.